A few exchanges later, we agreed to co-blog on the topic - and here in a question and answer format, is our discussion on the complexities of the mentor-mentee relationship. What infrastructure do you have, and what do you need? If promotion is planned, have you reviewed Academic Promotions policy and promotion requirements with your mentor? It’s about how you can help them accomplish what they want to accomplish. This can range from having formal structured mentorship programs to having informal programs within a supportive culture. How can I be a good mentor? There are a multitude of ways to mentoring impacts others. What are you currently doing that you want to continue doing? If you’re a mentee, here’s what you’re expected to do in the relationship: If you’re a young professional, you might be used to other people calling the shots at work: setting goals, priorities, timelines, etc. — Euginia Herlihy. “We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give.” — Winston Churchill, 10. Failed mentoring relationships occur when there is a mismatch between mentor and mentee. If a mentor suggests to a mentee that they should read an article, take a class, or meet with another individual, the mentee should follow through on these. There is concern that the #MeToo movement is “creating a culture of fear” among male academics. Both should have a good idea of what needs to be accomplished between meetings and what may be discussed at the next meeting. Want to build a mentorship program that works for your business? The mentor should advocate for the mentee and help protect her/his time to ensure her/his success. : A Woman's Guide to Her Stay-At-Home Man, The Geeks Shall Inherit the Earth: Popularity, Quirk Theory and Why Outsiders Thrive After High School, The Underground History of American Education: An Intimate Investigation Into the Prison of Modern Schooling. What are your short term, intermediate and long term goals? But over time, we’ve uncovered some common themes by connecting with global HR leaders, executive mentors, enterprise people leaders, and high-potential protégés on mentorship. When mentoring, I strive to maximize human potential.” — Donald Sadoway, 13. And once you know what the goal is, the path to getting there is just as important.” — Chris Ciulla, author of WeCulture, “How do you earn influence where people will follow you, even if you don’t have any direct or positional authority over them? How the mentor changes the mentee from ordinariness to extra-ordinariness; the seed of purposefulness that is planted and nurtured for great fruits; the payer from afar from the mentor to the mentee; and the great inspirations the mentee takes from the mentor to dare unrelentingly to face the storms regardless of how arduous the errand may be with or without the presence of the mentor.”, “True Mentors, don't make their mentees a clone of themselves”, “It is a solemn duty to change lives positively.It is a noble honor to inspire and be there for others.It is an irresistible necessity to have empathy; to understand the situations and the reasons for the actions of others. ― Margaret Mead. You must care. New LIVE course: Essentials of Emotional Intelligence with Daniel Goleman, Mentoring can elevate women in tech (webinar recap). “My mentor said, ‘Let’s go do it,’ not ‘You go do it.’ How powerful when someone says, ‘Let’s!’” — Jim Rohn. The mentor/mentee should be able to discuss this directly, and it could be reasonable for mentees to ask the mentor to stay on as an informal mentor. What academic accomplishments have occurred since your last meeting with your mentor? As a mentee, you should ask yourself the list of important questions below. If the mentee feels too intimidated to say no to a superior who requests they participate in an activity, s/he may consider using the phrase: “While I greatly appreciate the offer and I’m very interested in participating, I ran this by my mentor who suggested that I decline.”. Who should schedule the meetings? What are not doing that you should or want to start doing? (3-5 year plan). Commonly, the mentor/mentee may feel that another pairing may be more beneficial in terms of a better “fit” of expertise. Many mentors expect their mentees to do all the work while they serve in a consultation role. But it can also lead to revelations and better ways of doing things.” — Erin Lynn, Associate Manager of Regulatory Compliance at Allstate, “My mentor… showed me that, when things go sideways, blame has no place in the room.”  — Chris Ciulla, “Listening is the building block to being a good mentor.” — Chris Ciulla, “I’m here to listen. We need collaborative colleagues and multidisciplinary teams to succeed. That's why Engagedly builds powerful, people-centric softwares so companies can buid happier workplaces. “Colleagues are a wonderful thing – but mentors, that’s where the real work gets done.” — Junot Diaz. “You know, you do need mentors, but in the end, you really just need to believe in yourself.” — Diana Ross, 11. In fact, doing so can jeopardize the effectiveness of the mentoring relationship because the mentee may be more reticent to share their thoughts and dilemmas. Consider planning meetings away from regular clinics and offices to avoid interruptions. Successful mentor-mentee relationships should be fulfilling and beneficial for all involved. Explore our collection of motivational and famous quotes by authors you know and love. You will clarify your values and your statement will act as a guide to decision-making. It’s not as hard as you think. Make sure your motivations for being a mentor are in the right place. All mentoring relationships will change over time, and many/most will evolve to the point where it is time for the mentee to move on to a different mentor. “Every single opportunity we’re presented with gives us an opportunity to learn, grow, be inspired — and share that with others.” —, “I’ve never had a woman who took me by the hand and said ‘Mary, you have a lot of potential. I’m here to absorb, ask questions, and allow them to come to their own conclusions rather than shoving advice down their throats.” —, , Director of Planning and Building Services for Lafayette, CA, “I start with a recognition and appreciation that everyone has their own story… it’s important that I absorb people’s stories without judgement.” —, “My most valued mentor… taught me that failing didn’t equate to failure, it just meant you had another shot at getting it right.” —, , SVP of HR for Hewlett Packard Enterprise, “I strongly believe in rewarding people for their accomplishments, and, allowing them to make mistakes.

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